Tag Archive: desire


It’s getting worse now. It’s been five months since my husband and I have had sex. We barely touch each other and we may peck each other on the lips maybe once a week or so. But nothing more intimate than that.

Since my last post we have had a child, I know you are thinking how did she manage to do that. Is the baby his?
Yes, the baby is his and we managed it because he was drunk. Let me explain.

It was labor day weekend. We found ourselves unusually happy because things in our lives were looking up. So we invited some friends over for an impromptu party. My husband loves to entertain and entertaining makes him exceptionally happy. So we cooked out, played cards, danced, got drunk, and had a really nice time with our friends.

At the end of the night we were both inebriated and my husband found himself to be extremely horny. I think when he is drunk I look like a glass of ice cold water to a man stranded in the desert. So he jumped my bones. I mean he actually took the time to get me there.

He ate my pussy, something he rarely does and he sucked on my breast. He even fingered me and I love to be fingered. He didn’t kiss me though which was ok because truth be told I don’t really like the way he kisses and he won’t let me teach him how to kiss. But that is just a minor infraction. The show stopper was his big hard dick. It stayed hard through the entire interlude which lasted for at least two hours because he came twice and we took a lot of oral breaks. My husband loves to have his dick sucked. I mentioned in my post self preservation my husband is quite satisfied with having his dick sucked and no sex. I wouldn’t mind sucking his dick all the time but he doesn’t cum when I suck his dick. So after a while I get bored. There is no end to the act, it is just continual dick sucking all night long.  But I am digressing. So sometime during that wonderfully passion filled night of unabated sex I got pregnant.

Even though they say pregnant pussy is the best pussy, if I remember correctly my husband and I had sex only 3 or 4 times throughout the pregnancy. Which was actually ok with me because my sex drive was very low while I was pregnant. I was very surprised to find it so because I am such a sex kitten and I am always in the mood for some hot steamy sex.

Well it’s been over a year since my child was born and the sex has definitely become less and less frequent. I am finding that I won’t even try to make myself look attractive for him anymore. We don’t have date nights or do anything fun. He generally hides away in his computer room while me and our child do our own thing. I wonder if he has found some kind of fling on the Internet. I have heard stories of men being addicted to sex chat rooms and things of that nature. I remember early on in our marriage that was a real big problem for us, one that really never got addressed.

As with all my other post, I am lonely and VERY sexually frustrated but now I don’t even have the time to cheat. I don’t have a standby babysitter and my husband doesn’t think I should have any alone time. What am I to do?

I have always been a sexual person. Even as a teenager I knew I was destined for a wild and passionate sex life. And I can say that in my lifetime I have had some of the best sex more than anyone else I know. I have had threesomes, foursomes, I have done it in public, in groups, one on one and almost any situation you can think of. There are some things that I haven’t done that I still fantasize about doing but now that I am married I just don’t see those things happening.

My husband is not sexually attracted to me in anyway. When we are lying in bed together naked and he is holding me his penis doesn’t even get erect and I know it isn’t a physical problem, it’s a mental problem. He just doesn’t have the desire to have sex with me anymore. He has said so many hurtful things to me about how he finds me unattractive and he is never shy about telling me how he finds other women attractive and how they turn him on and how he would like to sex them. In fact one time I asked him what turns him on about me and he just looked at me with a blank stare on his face. It has gotten to the point that I am relieved we don’t have sex anymore because no longer do I climax. I have never had a problem climaxing during sex and even now when I masturbate I climax and it is such sweet relief. But with my husband nothing, no reaction whatsoever and it makes me so sad. I wish I had a sexually fulfilling marriage. I never thought I would get married but I always hoped that if I did it would be to a man that was as passionate about sex as I am and that desired me. How did I end up here? How did I end up in this type of marriage? And what do I do about it now?

I am so lonely and sexually frustrated. I discussed having an open marriage with my husband. But he seems to think I wouldn’t be able to handle it. But it’s hard to be jealous when all the physical intimacy between us has diminished. It’s like we are just roommates. I now understand how couples stay married and sleep in separate bedrooms but that isn’t the type of marriage I want. I want passion and sex every day even on the days when I am dog tired. I want to feel comfortable enough to climb on top of my husband in the middle of the night if the mood strikes me. Now I am afraid to touch my husband for fear of the rejection I know that will surely come  and I wouldn’t dare try to ride him, he would probably throw me off.

I think he is getting ready to cheat on me anyway. He has been talking a lot lately about this new girl he met at his job.  He has started getting late night calls. I don’t check his phone or anything but I am not a dummy. I have been cheated on before and I know all the classic signs. I will admit apart of me wishes he would just find some desire for me and another part of me hopes that she makes him happy sexually and then I will be free to find me someone who will make me happy sexually. I am torn.

I am so horny tonight but no one whom to turn. It’s another lonely night for me. I just want to be with someone who desires me and just pushes me up against the wall or bends me over the couch and tells me how badly he wants to fuck me as he penetrates me with his big hard dick. What’s a lonely girl to do?